Mark Zuckerberg Spends Billions Implementing Wildlife Into Metaverse

Mark Zuckerberg introduced a profitable partnership at present with a number of software program programmers that may reportedly see the combination of very lifelike geese into the Horizon Worlds platform. 

“We’ve got to stop letting Mark make these deals,” mentioned a involved Fb government who requested to stay nameless for concern of repercussions. “Some kids got a hold of his phone number and in what was clearly a prank call suggested they could sell him some pretty amazing duck assets for a cool 10 figures. Mark gets so excited about this stuff, he just couldn’t agree fast enough. He wasn’t even put off when the thing showed up on a floppy disk. If I don’t miss my guess, I believe my boss has severely overpaid for a series of decades old jpeg files. Jesus Christ.” 

Customers of Horizon Worlds weren’t instantly impressed with the costly acquisition. 

“Wow, it looks like that video game from 40 years ago,” mentioned Meta worker Brandi Moore, whereas utilizing her firm issued Meta Quest headset to view the brand new geese. “I’m only in here because we get in trouble if we don’t use this shit for an hour a day, and wow, what exactly is the appeal here? These ducks look like shit, and even if they looked great, why is he pivoting the future of his dominant social media company on virtual ducks? It makes no sense.” 

“10 more minutes and I can leave this shit and play some Beat Saber,” she added, checking the stopwatch on her telephone. 

Although many throughout the company have been skeptical of the fowl acquisition, the CEO of Meta remained optimistic. 

“Bringing these realistic ducks into Metaverse Horizons is just the beginning,” mentioned Mark Zuckerberg, who just lately laid off 13% off his workforce after having sunk an estimated 100 billion {dollars} into Meta’s new course. “Imagine if we were to simulate hunting these realistic ducks with some sort of an in-game weapon. We think this is something we might be able to offer users in the next five to seven years. Hunting Ducks with Mark Zuckerberg. What do you think? Sounds pretty fun, huh? I think made a really good deal on this one.” 

As of press time, Zuckerberg additionally introduced massive investments in a number of startup firms, together with the PEN15 Membership, Deez & Associates, and Ligma Industries.